Our Story



My Own Conspiracy Theory 




(updated 8/23/2008)



Conan O'Brien 

Letter from Abby:

"Ted is not a jerk.  But he has stupid hair.  Totally stupid, awesome hair.  I haven't seen him in a while...does he still have his lip fur?  He totally looked like Tom Selleck!  He was like a stupid Magnum...a stupid awesome Magnum.  Wow, I am such a felictophiliac!"


Letter from Amy:

"No jerk has ever gotten a butterfly tattoo...a hoe tag...ass antlers...Panama City License Plate...a tramp stamp.  Seriously...Ted is hot (I should know I'm a 12!)  And he is definitely not a stripper from Reno with daddy issues (though I hear he has some daddy issues)."


Letter from Anonymous MacLaren's Bar Patron:

"I never dated Ted, but I’ve been in love with Drunk Ted ever since I heard him sing 'Voices' at MacLaren’s one night.  Melted my heart.  No jerk would sing Cheap Trick."


Letter from [name withheld]:

"I didn't realize I knew Ted until I came to this website.  I didn't really remember his name since we met on Halloween and there were costumes and my world-famous Tootsie Rolls involved.  But when I saw his picture on here I immediately remembered him.  His "hanging chad" costume didn't really disguise him but it was quite clever.  He is definitely not a jerk!  Looking back my costume was a little on the revealing side, but Ted was a perfect gentleman looking me in eyes the whole time we talked (I can't say the same for his creepy friend...and I might be mistaken, but I could have sworn I saw his friend in three different costumes that night) Ted seemed genuinely interested in my work with penguins.  I had to check out of the party a little early and was a little disappointed when he didn't call, but it's not like he said he'd call just to get me into bed!  I can't imagine he would do such a thing!  I had planned on going back to try and meet up with him again, but I got a chance to join a research team in Antarctica.  Such is life, but nothing from that night indicated Ted was a jerk."


Letter from Jeannie Radford:

"The Ted I knew back at Wesleyan was adventurous, thoughtful, and cute.  Certainly not a jerk!  Ted jumped at the chance to backpack across Europe while we were on break; I still smile at the pictures of Ted imitating the Royal Guard.  And then when one of the guards got mad at him, Ted called him Admiral Jerk of the Royal British Douchery.  Classic!!!  We bought matching red phone booths, and he would surprise me with mixtapes by hiding them inside the door!  Sadly, since we both liked olives, we decided that it wouldn't work.  But Ted Mosby a jerk?  Sounds like you have the wrong guy!"


Letter from Molly Mackenzie:

"Ted Mosby is most definitely NOT a jerk!  He is a sweet, sensitive guy.  I was the one who was a jerk.  Ted was pure  and innocent, so I manipulated him to get what I wanted.  Then I ditched him right away, taking twenty bucks on the way out.  Ted!  If you read this, I am so sorry."



Letter from Karen:

"I can't believe someone actually thinks Teddy is a jerk!  He  is such a nice guy.  When we split up, it was mutual.  I mean, I brought it up first, but it was totally mutual.  We just decided that we couldn't make the long distance thing work.  But there were still so many wonderful things about him...the way he would celebrate so loudly when I let him win at Zitch Dog...the way his decorative spectacles hung low on his nose as he read Descartes...the way he lived in the moment...I mean, I learned a lot from Ted.  He taught me that before I can know anything I must first doubt everything I know.  And he was the first  person I knew who used electronic-mail.  In the end, though, he just wasn't fun enough for me when I was a silly little college girl.  I still don't know what I was thinking when we decided to split up, but I know one thing for sure --- Teddy was not the least bit of a jerk."



Letter from Trudy:

"Ted Mosby?  A jerk?  Yeah right!  Ted is the second nicest guy I've ever been with (just behind a little boy in my neighborhood growing up, who had the most adorable New York Jets jacket).  Ted is charming, funny, and hot!  Above all of that, though, Ted is the most adventurous guy I've ever been with.  You wouldn't believe the things we did with  a pineapple the first night we were together!  Haha, I won't go into too much detail, but let's just say that I wouldn't eat a pineapple that had seen what that pineapple had seen.  Ok, I am getting off-track....Ted is awesome....he is not a jerk!!!  Ted, if you read this, Rachel's been asking about you....just putting it out there...hahaha!!!!"



Letter from Ellen Pierce:

"Now, I never dated Ted Mosby, but in all my time at Love Solutions I never met a nicer, more sincere guy than Ted.

But, subjective feelings aside, let's analyze this scientifically:


-Ted loves brunch (as long as it's not with a bunch of phonies); no jerks love brunch.

-Ted has great taste in music (Summer Breeze!!!); no jerks listen to Seals and Croft.

-Ted looks a little like John Cusack; Cu is assuredly not a jerk.


So, there you have it: Ted Mosby is not a jerk!"



Letter from Robin Scherbatsky:

"Ted is literally the sweetest guy in the world.  He's like a modern-day Martin Frobisher.  If Ted took his awesomeness and built a skyscraper out of it, it would literally be taller than Mount Waddington!  That's over 4,000 meters tall!  When we split up, I literally cried forever.  Yet, we both wanted different things, so we knew it wouldn't work oot in the end.  Still, Ted is not a jerk.  Would a jerk steal a Smurf Penis just to impress a girl?  Would a jerk literally make it rain just to see me?  I don't think so.  In fact, Teddy Boy and I are still literally the best of friends.  Anyone who thinks Ted is a jerk is a major idiot (Major Idiot!).  Let me put it this way:  I wouldn't trade the time I spent with Ted for literally all the grizzly paw ice cream sandwiches in the world."



Letter from Blah-Blah:

"Ted Mosby is not a jerk.  He might suck at World of Warcraft, but that doesn't make him a jerk."



Letter from Cathy:

"When I saw that someone made a webpage saying that Ted Mosby was a jerk, I just cracked up, where does that phrase come from anyways?  cracked up?  do you think Humpty Dumpty came up with it?  remember that song "The Humpty Dance"?  ohmygod, I had totally forgotten about Digital Underground, I bet they got their name from the Underground Railroad, but how did that get its name...was there an actual railroad?  choo-choo train with a little caboose, you know who had a cute caboose? Mel Gibson in Lethal Weapon, but really aren't all weapons lethal?  seems like a silly name, Mel isn't a silly name unless it's short for Melvin, Melvin! that's what Bill and Ted gave to Death in their Bogus Journey...whatever happened to Alex Winter?  do you think there is an alternate universe where he got all the roles Keanu Reeves got...ohmygod he was so good in The Replacements, there was a deaf guy in that too, I used to date a deaf guy, that was after I was a blonde for a little, blonde, not, blonde, not, blonde, not, I just couldn't make up my mind!"





visitors since 4/2/2008

If you are one of Ted's ex-girlfriends and would like to let the world know that you think that Ted is not a jerk, e-mail me.



Note: Natalie, stop e-mailing me unless you have something nice to say about Ted.  Oh, and your threats of Krav Maga don't scare me!



Okay, Natalie, fine!  I will let you have your say. 

E-mail me your arguments against Ted, and I will publish them here in a point - counter point.


Here it is!  Finally!

Natalie and I square off...over AIM!!!


Natalie vs. Victoria